Say Everything You Mean and Mean Everything You Say!
So often we could find inside ourselves an issue where we're apprehensive about speaking up, tip-toeing nervously around people, hesitant to cause offence or why not be seen in an adverse or unfavourable light.
The situation with this approach is our words and the body language may be from sync collectively, that may cause confusion or uncertainty within our relationships. Our manner may be misconstrued as hostile, unfriendly or unclear. Because our communication is performed non-verbally it happens to be crucial that you say anything you mean and mean anything you say.
Here are some familiar situations.
- Apologies normally include many elements. Natural meats well have felt that a situation warranted something being said but afterwards have regretted our tone or upset and rift which includes since occurred. In most cases major disharmony won't be the intention and we've simply wanted to clear the air, so we may need to get an appropriate moment where you can apologise to the hurt and distress that has been caused. There is no need to retract everything, especially if certain grievances should be voiced but, on reflection, it may be our communications could have been handled more sensitively or at the more appropriate time.
- Does one hate to convey no? Natural meats be loathe to decline requests and decline however find ourselves increasingly overwhelmed with things we don't might like to do. Or we might gradually recognise that we're accepting increasingly more tasks and responsibilities. What needs to occur in those instances?
Might or not it's we need to find better ways of saying no, of understanding how to delegate or discretely removing ourselves from your equation? Prior to deciding to get automatically agreeing to everything stop and assess in the event you actually want to be concerned; do you wish to do that, have you the time or inclination to battle just one more commitment or arrangement? Consider all those feelings about it and, when relevant, find appropriately assertive approaches to say no.
- Are you currently reluctant to say yes? Equally, we might be considered a little unsure or with a lack of confidence and find it difficult to agree things that we suspect other medication is better at. Or we might speculate as to why we're being included or invited. The problem with declining too many invitations is that we might eventually not asked along. Find methods to feel better about you, maybe with some counselling and hypnotherapy. Then choose the items that appeal, those that for you to do, so you can really mean the reasons you say and say everything you mean.
- Are you finding it hard in truth and say everything you mean or express your emotions? Achieving this can to start with have to have a little forethought regarding your choice of words, especially if you're getting into unfamiliar vocal territory. If other people eloquent, better educated or nit-picky about the way things are said, if they regularly ascribe inferences and take offence when none was intended it can result in us becoming hesitant about expressing ourselves.
We can become fearful of being jumped upon or of having our words dissected and criticised. Practise what you need to express ahead of time, preferably running though a couple of alternative scenarios. Familiarise yourself with those alternative ideas; then you can certainly be a little more confident and sure you mean anything you say.
- Think about 'white lies'? Should they receive some consideration? The 'do I look okay?' or pressure to appreciate someone's efforts on the behalf can be a time when we need to look at the requirement being polite and courteous as opposed to too blunt or honest. When we're supportive, encouraging and acknowledging of someone's efforts it might be more appropriate to offer appreciation, with a few generous words, so enabling a full day to continue in the more upbeat way.
There could be possibilities to deliver subtle hints, like 'I prefer you in the blue' or 'here, i want to demonstrate how to do this', but saying what you mean may be tailored to let you be kind within a loyal, affectionate way.
- Choosing what you are saying with care so that you're genuine and open assists in building good, solid relationships. There isn't any hidden agenda or wish to manipulate, coerce or gain an unfair advantage when you're devious or duplicitous.
Counselling and hypnotherapy offers effective means of improving your self-worth and dealing with old, unwanted means of contemplating yourself and healing automatic, reactive responses that no longer serve you well. Purchase yourself because you're important. You are inside a stronger position to convey anything you mean and mean every thing you say.
Susan Leigh, counsellor, hypnotherapist, relationship counsellor, writer & media contributor offers benefit relationship issues, stress management, assertiveness and confidence. She works together individual clients, couples and offers corporate workshops and support.
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